10 YEAR POST

It's been 10 years since I made the first post on this blog. And it's been about 3 years since the last post.

I guess I felt obligated to address 10 years passing. Feeling a little sullen, I suppose. So, I'm mustering through with this impromptu post.

I'm preparing to change gears, mentally. I think up till now over the last 10 years, my aim, even if just unconsciously, was to get better at drawing. Forwarding the skill, without giving much thought to marketing it. 

In hindsight, not much thought to went to furthering a career in drawing, just honing the skill- which is the mindset I'm trying to change.

I like to believe I succeeded in achieving the goal; I feel like I draw better than ten years ago. So, in that, I feel successful, but it feels ...dry. Flat.

I've been wondering, have I been too obsessed with becoming better? Has that one goal blinded me to what could have been other, more significant gains? I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not.

Is this post a bookend? Meant to end all this? Who knows? I hope not.

All thoughts compressed, I suppose I'm feeling like I've been stuck in a dream in the role of Sisyphus.

A better way of thinking about it though, that makes me at least feel better, is in terms of old cinema Kung Fu. I could also be looking at it as though I've been practicing my tree splintering punch for 10 years, and now it's time to start exploding things with my fists that aren't trees.

So, I guess the change I've been trying to accept lately, is no more trees solitarily in the forest, from now on, only in town square.